Back in August (when I wrote this) I decided to join a different church. There were a number of factors which entered in, but none of them pertain to why I’m writing this.
One of the requirements was to give my personal testimony about why I worship Christ. Since I’m writing it down anyway, why not turn it into a blog post? But by the time this post is scheduled three months or more will have passed.
Why the delay? Because I have so many messages in the queue already that my once-per-week postings are more than three months out from when I write them. Unless something messes up my calculation (see my post on Confusion), this should be slated for December 6th.
I’ve been writing these posts since May 25th, 2018. My first post (Exactly) details the beginnings of my turn toward Jesus. The short version of that post is this:
Circa 1980 I heard a sermon about the dude who threw a wedding party for his kid. None of the well-to-do folks living in the neighborhood came to the party, so this king had his “people” round up the poor and homeless so his son could have a good party. “Give them decent clothes to wear.”
But one of those people didn’t want to change clothes and the king booted him out.
On the drive home after church that day I said, “Well, if it had been me, when the king asked my what I was doing there, I’d have said, ‘You invited me.’”
My sister turned to me and said, “Exactly.”
With one word she had me spinning. When I stopped, I may have been facing the same direction as before, but my eyes had turned. As any advertising executive will tell you, the first step is grabbing the eyes.
Over the years there have been a number of dots in a mosaic (for my post, see Seurat) that eventually manifested in me turning to Christ.
Back in my ELCA Confirmation days (again circa 1980), I mocked my best friend for watching the Billy Graham Crusades. Since I’d never seen one I’d never seen an alter call. I’d never heard of the concept. When my sister went to college she talked about making a decision for Christ, and I had no idea what that meant.
Linda and I were married in 1999. She was a member of Bible Evangelical Free Church in Tomah. I left my ELCA church in Onalaska and joined BEFC (it might have been a year later that I became a member). Part of that process was to explain why I believed in Christ. I told the elders, “It seems like I always have, but every day the implications of that belief are more and more clear.”
That satisfied them and me.
Until maybe a year later Pastor Tim Erickson, during a large service (might have been Christmas Eve) asked if there was anyone who wanted to dedicate their life to Christ. I’d never heard of that before. I was blown away, but filled out the card in the seat-back in front of me. “Make sure you give that card,” Pastor Tim said, “to one of the volunteers.”
I did.
The volunteer scoffed.
You see, that person had known me for about two years by that time. He saw someone who was a “Christian” turn into a Christian, and didn’t recognize the change. Since I’d always been the “good kid” there wasn’t much TO change in my behavior.
That was the day my life changed, though. Through the years since then my growth has been mostly anemic until I started blogging. I decided I needed to know more and more, and now I can’t get enough.
One day, while reading Warren Wiersbe’s exposition on Joshua, I was particularly impressed with his point on Jesus being our Sanctuary City. I read that section to Linda and thought to myself, “What a wonderful thing I’ve discovered.”
As if an audible voice spoke, I heard, “No you didn’t.”
“What?”
“You didn’t discover that.”
“Well, no, I guess Wiersbe did.”
“He didn’t either.”
“What?”
“He didn’t discover that.”
Then I remembered my Confirmation class and Luther’s Small Catechism. “I know that I cannot, by my own effort or understanding, come to Jesus Christ or know Him.”
BAM!
Another turning point. God reveals Himself to us because we do not seek Him. If it wasn’t for Him, we’d be as lost as the idolaters of ancient Israel.
One of my greatest fears is dying alone. Having married someone seventeen years older than me, with all her kids comfortably into adulthood in 1999, those kids don’t have much of an emotional attachment to me. Assuming Linda dies before I do, I don’t have much hope of them keeping in touch.
So one day I said to God, “I’m scared, Lord.”
“No your not.”
“What?”
“You’re not scared.”
Then I wasn’t.
That was this year - maybe in June.
So what has God done for me? He’s revealed Himself to me on multiple occasions. He’s taken away my biggest fear, which has never been about death. Even before Linda and I were married I faced imminent death with a calmness most find false bravado. It’s not false. Death has never scared me. (Dying, on the other hand . . . .)
I guess that’s all I have to say on that topic. I could add details here and there, but that’s about it. No huge Earth-shattering conversion because I was already on the path to Him.
Only the details have been changed to protect the innocent.
(BTW, nobody’s innocent.)
